Sistah's Blog

Can you believe this is the last day of January for the first month of 2016? I want to encourage you to go into February with a determined mindset to make 2016 better than 2015.  Don't just have goals, resolutions, and a vision board done.  You need to have a plan of action to implement these goals  and bring your dreams to life.  Let's rise up with action that will help us to complete our goals and reach our dreams.  Do you need a little inspiration?  Listen to Andra Day beautiful song Rise Up.  YouTube video Find your theme for this year and play it as a reminder to Rise up and walk into your purpose in 2016.  It's time for you to rise up, stand up, and have a positive impact on someones life.  You were born with a special gift inside of you waiting to be birthed.  I encourage you to tap into that gift and talent in 2016 to let your light shine.  This is your year to walk into your purpose and destiny....

We are in the second week of 2016 and many people have set resolutions while some have set goals.  Which did you set this month for 2016?  Was its goals or resolutions?  For me, I set goals for each month on my goal board.  Goals are more attainable and realistic especially because you write them down.  I decided to give this year a definitive theme and purpose direction.  This year is prosperity and wealth as my theme as I step out on faith to follow my dreams.  My focused theme envolves around  becoming better than I was a year ago by investing in: My Health My Finances My Dreams My Happiness These are the areas that I have defined goals with an action plan in place to meet expectations each month on my goal board.  You cannot have goals without an action plan.  Sometimes we as mothers forget about ourselves and we get lost in the shuffle of our children's and spouses' activities, dreams, and ha...

Last week, the show Being Mary Jane touched on a very sensitive matter that was perfect timing.  It's a topic that we sometimes dance around because we don't want to be a burden to family and friends.  Keeping quiet hurts inside and out.  It's time to start speaking out and talking to someone about how we feel on the inside.  The silence will kill you if kept bottled up inside while you continue to lie to yourself that you are okay.   It will eat at you day in and day out until you explode.  Coping does not help with your feelings of being rejected, lost, broken, and depressed state of mind,heart, and soul.    Have you been there?  You put on a facad that everything is okay, but you are lying to yourself, friends, and family.  This is when you have to stop telling yourself that you do not need to talk to anyone.  This is the time to look in the mirror and tell yourself that "You love you" and seek help that will get yo...

Today was a perfect day to go see War Room , on Labor Day.   The movie was directed by Alex Kendrick.   This movie was powerful in so many ways and it touched my heart to see how your elders can teach another married woman how to find God, love God, and most important teach her how to pray.   We as women take on so many roles that sometimes we allow life to overtake our prayer life and time with God.   There were so many things that I loved about this movie especially Miss Clara played by Karen Abercrombie.   She portrayed this role perfectly that it reminded me of good friend.   Miss Clara’s advice to married women and her powerful prayer at the end made me want to go home and clean out a closet to make it my “ War Room ”.   Photo Credits Source: Tri-Star Pictures/Facebook Group War Room This is not just a movie for black families or black couples; it’s a movie for all believers , all races, and non-believers.   Not to give too mu...

Why Place limits on your gifts and talents?  Have you ever asked yourself why do you do this?  There is a quote that that sparked this topic and I could not help but ask the question to everyone about placing limits on our gifts, talents, and our lives.  "Don't limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do.  You can go as far as your mind lets you.  What you beleive, remember you can achieve." by Mary Kay Ash Sometimes we place limits on ourselves without knowing the consequences.  I say this because their are so many dreamers walking around not using or sharing their gifts or talents.  Some are afraid because they fear the cost it will take to make their dreams a reality.  What about the benefits you will reap for investing in your dreams?  One has to believe in his or her dream before anyone else can.  How many times have you heard this?  Sometimes we don't think we can do what we b...

Have you ever worked in an environment that was toxic to your health, your spirit, and your well being? How did you handle it? How did it affect your personal life and your work performance? Photo credit: Pinterest via 500px.com   There are many characteristics that can describe a toxic workplace or toxic environment. They range from over stressed, lack of communication between management, lack of communication between departments, lack of support from management that leads to depression, weight gain, and other health issues.   Feeling overwhelmed and not getting having the proper support system in place that makes an employee feel unappreciated and over worked.  The tears fall as you drive off from your driveway because your spirit cannot take another day of a toxic workplace. You always feel sad because you dread coming to work. You feel your energy being depleted as you get out of your vehicle in the parking lot. Speaking from experience, a...

As apart of a new series for Self-Love and Self-Awareness, we like to discuss and inspire someone with our topics in these next couple of weeks.  Have you ever found yourself in a dark place?  About 3 years ago, I found myself in that dark place feeling depressed, unappreciated, and lost.  This was a point and place in my life where I was struggling with who I was, where I belonged, and where I should be.  I found myself trying to please everyone, but make me happy.  The man I was with didn't see the beautiful diamond standing before him instead, he was trying to mold me into someone I was not.  Have you ever been in this position? Photo Credits: Pinterest/Phoenix Org -Quote Dr. Steve Maraboli   Over the course of three years, I would loose myself and drift into this dark place.  I was smiling on the outside and crying on the inside for someone to see me.  The battle was real and you find yourself trying to hold it all to...

Celibacy, is this the rebirth of a woman?  When you decide to give your body back to God and wait on your Mr. Right, is it the rebirth of the woman in you?  Practicing celibacy will help you improve your self-worth, give you clarity, and develop an intimate relationship.      Women desire for a relationship that has purpose and true unconditional love.  We need a relationship to have purpose not just sex.   A relationship that has direction and true meaning of love. You can reach that type of relationship when you practice celibacy.  Love is defined as an emotion of intimacy. So being celibate for one woman might have a different meaning for the next woman.  Our choices and reasons for waiting on our true chosen husband is to truly be his missing rib of completeness.   Taking a journey of celibacy, one discovers their wholeness, self-worth, and you fall in love...

Each day you sit and you dream about your of owning your own business, publishing your first novel, or getting your first acting position. You waited so long to follow your dreams that you thought it was impossible because you hit a few bumps along the journey. Those bumps along the journey of life caused you to defer your dreams.  You keep wishing and wanting to follow your dreams.  What's holding you back from following your dreams?  What exactly is it that you are afraid of?  Are there too many people in your ear?  Do you think that you are to old to follow what your heart truly desire?  Is there a burning desire that is waking you up in the middle of the night at night?  Many dream chasers are burden with these questions as they struggle to fulfill their dreams.  Over the years, you have made many sacrifices taking care of your family and friends.  Constantly talking about your dreams and no one is listening ...

A time to be thankful for family, friends, and associates.  What are you thankful for?  I am thankful for all the dream chasers, dream builders, ambitious women and men who step out on faith each day to pursue their dreams and purpose.  I am thankful for the inspiration that I received this year to truly follow my dreams and passion.  Oprah Winfrey said it best, "follow your passion you will find your purpose."  I am grateful for the support of my daughter, family, friends, and readers.  I am thankful for the many teachers and mentors that have crossed my path  to give me advise, guidance, direction, and hope that has influenced my passion of many interests.  I am grateful for the new circles of friendship, associates of trade, and new resources and relationships being established along this wonderful journey.  I am thankful for the dreams, the visions, and the plans God has placed in my spirit and birthed from my soul. It's time this w...

Falling in love is an amazing and beautiful journey with that special and unique person. We all strive to fall in love with our perfect soul mate.  Every little girl has sat and planned her wedding day with her prince charming.   Sometimes we fall in love with the wrong one that does not mean us any good physically or emotionally. Which distorts what love should be based on past pain.  Meanwhile, for some the journey to healing and lessons learned they discover what true love really is because someone took the time to teach what love represents.  There is a song by Fantasia with the words:   "Teach me how to love you cause I am ready to learn. Show me your willing to learn. Teach me what you need. I will follow your guide and Happy to grow with you."   Those are beautiful words revolved around someone teaching you how to love them.  The journey begins when that special person can show you how to lov...

All couples desire to have the perfect healthy and happy relationship.  Some of our elders who have been married for 50 plus years have given us some great advice on what makes a healthy and happy relationship that seems to slip through the cracks in some of today's relationships. Here are 10 tips from our wise elders for a healthy and happy relationship that has longevity: Build a Friendship - friendship is essential key to any relationship that will grow together over time. Learn to Compromise -learn to choose your battles for you don't always have to be right and you don't always have to get your way.  Be Honesty with one another and yourself - it's better to tell the truth than to tell a lie or even a little white lie.  Express how you feel in a non-confrontational voice Trust one another- Trust is earned and you start out by stepping out on faith and trusting him/her because you desire to be in a long-term relationship. Forgive each other- When disagre...

Are you a Bitter woman?  What happened that made you bitter? Being bitter is not attractive nor is it a quality any woman should hold onto.  It can be contagious to other women around you.  What is bitterness? Bitterness is a sour taste in a woman's spirit and heart that requires healing and forgiveness from the past pain and heartache.  It's like having a pity party because you didn't heal from the last relationship instead you got angry and grew bitter.  You carry that anger around with you for years instead of letting it go and learning from the relationship what ever it was that you needed to grow.  Instead, you allowed it to eat at your spirit and your opportunity for happiness. Have you ever noticed that your happiness is another persons misery?  They cannot stand to see anything good happen to you because it didn't happen to them in their last one, two, or three relationships.  They never have anything positive to say about relati...

Spread your wings and soar high like an eagle into your destiny.  There is no limit to your dreams.  The obstacles that come along the journey will make you stronger and better.  Don't sweat the small things for they are meant to distract you.  Stay focused on what is before you because this is your time to spread your wings dreamers. Take time to look at your life and ask yourself, Am I where I want to be?  Am I doing what I am truly passionate about? It's time to make a plan, set goals, and create the vision that will get you to your destiny.  Joel Osteen said it best, "Enlarge your vision and make room for the new things God wants to do in your life."  From his quote, we have characterize the Spread your Wing Principles for all the dreamers and dream chasers. Enlarge Your Vision                           ...

Can a woman get out of an abusive relationship?  Absolutely yes, you can walk away from your abuser with assistance, guidance, and support from various programs providing assistance to women and children in domestic violence living.  An abused woman has the right to make the choice to take back her life by taking back her power.  Many don't understand how hard it is for some women to walk away from an abusive relationship.  The effects of the physical, emotional,and mental abuse takes a psychological toll on the victim. Especially when it's made public to family, friends, and even co-workers she is then embarrassed and ashamed by the fact she stayed in an abusive relationship.  A woman in an abused relationship has to come to terms with reality that her safety and happiness is important. Walking away is not as simple as many experts describe it to be because of the damage done emotionally and physically will ...

I recently watched a video with Denzel Washington giving great advice to a group of men and women about their gifts and dreams.  He said, "dreams without goals remain dreams that ultimately fuel disappointment." He went on to say, that goals on achievement require discipline and consistency. He spoke the truth to all dreamers standing on that stage.    In order for you to make your dreams fall into alignment with your talents and gifts, one must set goals that will aid in materializing the dreams.  Every person on this earth was created in God's eye with a purpose that is unique to each individual. We are all created with special gifts and talents that require us to tap into and discovery who we are and why we are here.  There is a masterpiece hidden inside of our soul.  Our dreams tell a beautiful story about our lives.  Have you seen a sneak peak yet?  Big dreams require a bigger vision and bigger plan....

Learning how to love again starts with you learning how to love yourself.  How can you give love to someone else when you don't love yourself?  You can start by telling yourself that you love you.  To be able to receive love one must be able to recognize and experience the love languages.  Learning how to love again can be difficult when you are coming out of a unhealthy relationship.  You can love again because it is learned and earned from another person and love is not lost forever.  It takes time to heal a broken heart and forgiving the one who broke your heart is the key to a new start.  Forgiveness is important so that you are not holding onto the pain or the past.  One must remember, at the end of the day God still loves you unconditionally.  This is the type of love that you want to have in your life with no strings attached.  Unconditional Love is a beautiful thing and experiencing it will be a joy again. Photo Courtesty...

How can we as black women support one another in our crafts, talents, and gifts? Why do we tear one another down when one is doing something great or exciting?  Why do we not support one another? We are not competing with one another for we were each given unique gifts and talents.  Why is it that we tear one another down behind each other's back and smile in the sister's face pretending to support her ?  Every woman was placed on this earth with a purpose and passion.  We don't all tap into our gifts at the same time, but discovering who you are is the beauty of that journey. There are other ethnicity's that support and encourage one another, but our culture of black women is not 100% supportive of one another yet. I believe this is a barrier we can break by teaching one another.  For some reason, there is an attitude "Looking out for number one".  To be elevated in this day and age, you will need someone to teach you, show you, mentor yo...

Stand up King's of Purpose for you were created for greatness.  You were given talents and gifts that's awaiting to be birthed and released to make a difference in this world.  Despite the negative energy that has been displayed in the media, we must continue to encourage and support our young men. No parent shall live in fear of their child being shot to death for any reason.  Stand up King's of Purpose!  Hold your heads up high for you are the son's of the most high.      We encourage you to learn your rights, know your rights, and stand strong in position for your rights.  You are warriors of peace and justice not warriors of mad destruction. The violence must stop and there must be a change within the justice system to treat all men equally and fairly despite the color of their skin.  Our boys are dying too young before they learn their divine purpose, master their gift, and learn who...

Today's blog was inspired by a sermon that I watched last weekend about 5 Keys to your Soul mate by Pastor Toure Roberts of One Church International. I was inspired as I reviewed over my notes to write about "Soul mates".  The sermon was powerful and allowed me to reflect on past relationships where I thought I found my soul mate.  Many of the examples that were given through out the sermon I could relate to  and had a few "light bulb" moments as I examined my past relationships.  Examining the past prepares you for your present and future so that you don't make the same mistakes as well is ensure you learned the lesson that was apart of your journey on purpose.  It's given me a better assessment of what I should be looking for in a Soul mate and how to identify him when he is presented before me.  We all want to find our Soul mate and live happily every after!  Most importantly, to grow with someone that is your equal and compliments your ...