Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Is it time to burn that relationship checklist?

About two months ago, I read an article published by one of my favorite group of ladies (Six Brown Chicks) that I follow and read their blog articles.  The article "Your Dating Checklist is Keeping You Single " sparked my attention as they all do.  However, this one really got me to thinking because we all have our checklist of what we require of  that prospective man to meet before we will even give him a first look.   You can read that article in the below link http://www.chicagonow.com/six-brown-chicks/2015/01/your-dating-checklist-is-keeping-you-single/ . This article prompt my response and inspired this article topic.

"No one is perfect and we all have flaws. What about the persons character, his heart or his potential to grow with you. Better yet, to see you for who you are and not someone you are not. That unrealistic checklist needs to be burned."

As women, we have standards and prerequisites for the man that we desire to be apart our lives.  However, sometimes those standards grow into a lists that can get out of control which leads to our status of "single" to be much longer than we desired to be single. A good example of an unrealistic relationship checklist is the must haves: six pack, big feet, big hands, make six figures, no kids, drive a nice car, must be 6'5, and great in bed. Now does this list seem realistic at all?  Don't get me wrong, I like some of the things on that lists too, we all do.  Are those the only qualities that we define a man you would like to be with?  What happened to real qualities that add value to the relationship? What about his spiritual walk with God?  What about his morals and values that will be nurtured to raise a family? 

The checklist described above is one of those unrealistic lists that should be burned because it's not realistic nor is it genuine qualities of a real man. Your dream guy may not possess all of those checklist  qualities like being 6'5, he might be on the short side of height.  He might not have big hands and big feet, but he may have a big heart that will cherish the beautiful woman you are for all of his days. 
Photo Credits: Courtesy of Facebook group Relationship Advice for Black Women

A unrealistic list like the one above will keep you single because no man wants a woman that will become or will be a liability to him. A real man wants a woman who will be his compliment and n asset to him.   It's okay to have a checklist that has reasonable qualities that is realistic.  For example, handsome,spiritually grounded, ambitious, driven, and knows who he is and where he is going. Now that is a realistic checklist because it can be two fold not one way.  Whatever is on your checklist you need to make sure you possess those same qualities. 

Is your checklist keeping you single? Are you ready to burn that unrealistic checklist?